Big Girls Don't Cry
by xyouarethemoonx
Summary: Written before DH. Ginny breaks down before Harry leaves to go fight. One-shot, sweet and sappy.


The smell of your skin lingers on me, now

The smell of your skin lingers on me, now  
You're probably on your flight back to your hometown  
I need some shelter of my own protection baby  
Be with myself in center, clarity, peace, serenity

Ginny sighed, sitting on her bed in the Burrow. Every bit of her wanted either to cry, scream, sob, or yell. All over one raven-haired boy who was probably flying on his Firebolt to Godric's hollow. A memory of a few nights before kept on pushing itself to the front of her mind, no matter how hard she pushed back.

It had been at Bill and Fleur's wedding. The burrow had been done up beautifully, it was hard to believe that it was the hectic, crazy place she called home. Flowers were everywhere, their white petals blending together. Soothing music magically flowed from nowhere. And faeries glowed in the bushes, giving the landscape a fantasy light. It all seemed like a picture, not her childhood story.

Black hair stood out dramatically against the white that background everything. How she missed that hair! But this wasn't the Harry she knew so well. Yes, some of the old him still lingered, but most of him had been replaced by cold seriousness. He hadn't spoken two words to her the entire time he was here! When he had flowed to the Burrow for the wedding, it had taken every bit of her not to either slap him, hard, or kiss him, hard. She made herself return the silent treatment he was so uncaringly giving her.

All of this had to be because of him being noble! Stupid git! He doesn't realize that pushing her away makes her feel more in danger! He didn't know the pain and fury and hurt she was going through! And he thought he was doing her good!

Ginny remembered the way he had looked at her when she came down the stairs in her dress with a small smile that lasted only a second. Her bridesmaid gown was a light gold, which was a bit too flashy for her, but, as Fleur said, it did go with her Weasley hair. It complemented her body, fitting her every curve. Harry had looked at her with longing and regret in his eyes, but the barriers quickly went up once again, the hard cold Harry back.

The wedding ceremony had gone beautifully, with Fleur looking gorgeous in her cream colored gown. Everyone applauded, and a few (mainly Ginny's and Fleur's mum) shed tears of happiness. But it wasn't the marriage ceremony that she was worried about.

Ginny was worried about the reception afterwards. She had been avoiding Harry for the week he was here, but couldn't at the reception. She both wanted and didn't want to dance with him. Harry went for the latter. All night she shot him looks at the corner of her almond-shaped eyes, but they scolded herself for it. She did dance a few times, with her brothers and friends from school, such as Neville. But not Harry. Near the end of the party, it all came flooding over her. The war, Harry, and the danger. Tears welled up behind her eyes, but she fought them. Fearing them coming, she ran from the crowd and into the garden. Through hedges and flowers aglow with faeries, she ran till she sat in front of the pond. She sat on the ground, not caring about her dress, and pulled her knees to her chest, making herself not cry. She, Ginerva Weasley, would not cry! Even though her best friend, brother and ex-boyfriend were going into a dangerous war, and the latter being the decider of the future of the world. Not to mention her family and other friends being involved greatly. And her ex had broken it off with her to "protect her". She snorted to replace the tears that wanted to leak through. Stupid noble hero!

She didn't know how long she sat there, calling Harry every bad name she thought of. She was brought back into reality with the sound of footsteps behind her. She did _not_ want to be bothered now.

"Whoever it is, if they don't go away, I'm going to hex them into the next century!" she called out angrily.

"Ginny." She froze. She knew that voice too well. She heard it explain to her what happened in the Chamber, yell at Ron and Hermione, talk with her that night she won the Quidditch cup, and break up with her at Dumbledore's funeral.

"I'm warning you, if you don't leave, you'll be at the receiving end of one of my Bat Bogey Hexes!" she cried out, wanting him to leave. She didn't dare turn around, she didn't know if she could control herself if she saw his face. She heard Harry walk and sit down next to her. That sat there in silence, not looking at each other until Harry finally said something.

"Ginny, what's wrong?" He sincerely sounded concerned. _If he was so concerned, then why did he have to break it off to protect me?_ she thought bitterly. She knew why he did it, and she understood. She wouldn't yell at him for it though, no matter how much she wanted to or how much he deserved it.

"Nothing. I just wanted to get a way from the party, is all," she lied. She would not let him know that it was him that was making her so upset!

"You're upset about something." Harry said.

"No, I'm not. I just need some quiet. I don't thing I could stand seeing Bill kiss Phlegm one more time," she stubbornly replied. At least her last remark was true. It's not that she was disgusted, it was that the sweet, short kisses reminded her too much of when her and Harry hung out in the common room or by the lake.

"Ginny, I know you. You're upset." Darn that boy! He was right, of course. Harry continued. "I upset you, didn't I? But you have to understand why I did it. You may not care that you're in danger seeing me, but I do. You mean too much for me to lose you." He still cared! She knew that. But she couldn't burden him with her problems. She couldn't.

"No, it's not that. It's just the danger that you and Hermione and my family are going to enter. I just can't handle it," Ginny lied through her teeth. She was worried about the danger, but most of it was about Harry having to break it off with her. But she held herself together. Once again, she wanted to cry. But she wouldn't. She was too old to cry, it was childish of her to even think of it!

_  
I hope you know, I hope you know  
That this has nothing to do with you  
It's personal, myself and I  
We got some straightening out to do  
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket  
But I've gotta get a move on with my life  
It's time to be a big girl now  
And big girls don't cry  
Don't cry, Don't cry, Don't cry_

"Oh." Harry's voice was emotionless.

"Don't get me wrong, I will miss you. More than" she gulped before continuing, "More than you can imagine. But, I get it. Why you ended things between us. I don't agree with it, but I get it. And I need to move on. Especially with all of the bad things ahead."

"Oh." Was that all that boy can say? This left even more silence, except for the music playing softly in the background.

_The path that I'm walking, I must go alone  
I must take the baby steps till I'm full grown, full grown  
Fairy tales don't always have a happy ending, do they?  
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay  
_

_  
I hope you know, I hope you know  
That this has nothing to do with you  
It's personal, myself and I  
We got some straightening out to do  
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket  
But I've gotta get a move on with my life  
It's time to be a big girl now  
And big girls don't cry  
_

"But before you completely move on, may I have a dance?" Harry stood up and offered a hand. This confused Ginny greatly. Wasn't he the one that wanted to completely end it?

"O…kay." Ginny stood up, brushed herself off, and took his hand. She placed her other hand on his shoulder, while his rested on her waste. To even more her surprise, he held her close, his head leaning into her neck while hers was against his chest. She couldn't help but notice how nicely their bodies fit together. They stood there, slowly rocking to the music for quite a while before Harry broke the silence.

"Ginny, I need to tell you something." Harry whispered softly into her hair.

"Hmm?"

"I'm leaving tomorrow. With Ron and Hermione." This woke her from the trance she was in. Leaving? Why? Where? But before she could ask, he continued.

"I'm going to fly to my hometown first, where I was born. Godric's Hollow. Afterwards, we will be traveling the country. Don't ask why, because I won't tell you." Ever bit of her wanted to tell him not to go, to stay. The other wanted to dare him to tell her she can't come along.

"We won't be returning for my seventh year." This woke Ginny up even more. When he broke up with her, she thought that was bad! She knew she would still see him over the summer and next year. But now… Ginny suddenly felt dizzy, and needed to sit down. She released herself from Harry, and sat and the ground where she had stood, her head in her hands. She realized even more the danger everyone was in. Harry stood behind her.

"Stay safe Harry. Stay safe." Ginny stood up and faced him, embracing him. He returned the hug, holding her close. They let go of each other, and Ginny made to walk back to the party. But before she went two steps, Harry had grabbed her arm.

"Ginny, wait." She turned back to him, afraid at what he might say. "This, this might be the last time I ever see you. The mission I am going on is dangerous, and I might not return. I just want you to know that I care about you, but if something happens to me, move on." Ginny couldn't believe his words. All of this, this war, this everything, none of them, especially Harry, deserved. Why must they go through such a tragedy? She gulped down the tears. She mustn't worry him. He looked at her questioningly.

"Are you ok, Ginny?"

"Yes Harry. I'm fine. But thanks. Stay safe." Ginny repeated and hugged him, pulling him close. The tears kept on threatening her, but she ignored them. Harry held her closer, pushing their bodies together. His embrace was more urgent, for his time with her was running short. He held her long before letting her go with a lingering kiss on the cheek.

"I should be going in. It's late. Almost everyone else has gone." Ginny said, wanting to get out of there. She was about to cry, but she wouldn't! She couldn't! She motioned around with her arms to the quietness. People were slowly headed in. Ron and Hermione, she noticed, were walking hand in hand.

"Goodbye Harry."

"Goodbye, Gin." And with that, Ginny walked inside, and when once inside, ran into her room.

_  
Like a little school mate in the school yard  
We'll play jacks and UNO cards  
I'll be your best friend  
And you'll be mine, valentine  
Yes you can hold my hand if you want to  
'cause I wanna hold yours too  
We'll be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds  
But it's time for me to go home  
It's getting late, dark outside  
I need to be with myself in center, clarity, peace, serenity  
_

She thought about the lie she told to Harry, about how it didn't have to do with him, it was personal. The biggest lie she had ever told. For the rest of the night she fought off tears. She was a big girl, and big girls don't cry.

_  
I hope you know, I hope you know  
That this has nothing to do with you  
It's personal, myself and I  
We got some straightening out to do  
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket_

_But I've gotta get a move on with my life  
It's time to be a big girl now  
And big girls don't cry  
Don't cry, Don't cry, Don't cry  
_


End file.
